For Lindiwe…

A few months from now, someone will enter your life and make you question everything about it. She’s abrasive, but you’ll like her. Because she’s honest. She reminds you of what your life could’ve been if you’d had a different upbringing. She’ll make you reflect on yourself. You guys will grow close. You’ll get attached. She’ll be your best friend. She’ll leave after a year. You’ll cry over it. But you’ll email each other. You’ll lose touch. But you meet again years later and it’ll feel like she never left.

– Extract from Letter To My 16 Year Old Self

 

Thank you for being the above to me.

Thank you for making me question myself, for getting me to moisturise my feet. Thank you for being part of the “sexy 4”. For introducing me to The Roots. Thank you for letting me be your unofficial assistant editor for Chiasmus. Thank you for staying in touch when you were not busy.

Thank you for being brave. For being a revolutionary feminist. Thank you for being a fierce, proud black woman. Because “imperialist white- supremacist capitalist patriarchy”.

Thank you ad infinitum , Dr Lindiwe Diana Makhunga. You are at peace.

 

“The belief that boys won’t like books with female protagonists, that they will refuse to read them, the shaming that happens (from peers, parents, teachers, often right in front of me) when they do, the idea that girls should read about and understand boys but that boys don’t have to read about girls, that boys aren’t expected to understand and empathize with the female population of the world….this belief directly leads to rape culture. To a culture that tells boys and men, it doesn’t matter how the girl feels, what she wants. You don’t have to wonder. She is here to please you. She is here to do what you want. No one expects you to have to empathize with girls and women. As far as you need be concerned, they have no interior life.”

– Shannon Hale

Open Letter to Afrikan Sisters

As written by Nathi Xinwa (click here for blog)

The very world we occupy is built and harvested on the backs of Afrikan Sisters. Make no mistake, Sister, to think yourself so lowly to be a double-minority.

When we speak of this as the Motherland, you are implicated as the mother who has not only birthed mankind but raised it over centuries. So pay no mind Sister to those who walk on your back to get one up on you; for sometimes the learner believes themselves to be the teacher. But of course, in the face of this upside-down double-minority world we live in I, as Brother to all Sisters, ask that we talk a few things over.

Beauty defines the very nature of feminine, thus Woman is about beauty. Nothing else. This is the gospel you’ve been made to believe, which is an obvious lie. Feminine defines the nature of beauty. Woman is the living breathing word. She is beauty, not in looks or clothes or even money. Woman is beauty in doing, in living and being. She defines it, not the other way around. How sad it is to see you Sisters so beautiful; hidden under thick applications of self-hatred. Busy chasing beauty when you already have it.

And that is what Afrikan Men need to raze this broken system to the ground and raise this ruined continent to its full glory; Beautiful Afrikan Women. Equals in this never-ending fight to have a home. But life is hard for a Sister out there, everyone knows it. Each day tests your strength, but surviving is not enough. Stating facts and making (legitimate) excuses won’t change anything for the better. No one else is going to Mother all the nations because, no one else can. If you are the fortunate daughter of Afrika, you are in turn mother to her children. If you do not take ownership of your part in things, there is no one who can. Instead decisions will be made about you, conversations spoken without you and your children massacred in spite of you.

But then love in all its nakedness has perhaps been used to do the most damage to you. From boys and men who only know how to love with their body to twisted, incomplete reflections of self. Your pursuit for love has led you to an incredible state of self-hate. Many times you’ve not found peace within and sought it outside. Truly Sister the universe is remade in you. There is no greater truth than that you’ll find within and there is no greater lover either.

With love,
from an Afrikan Man.

6 Sexist Things Girls Say

Because girls can be sexist too, right?

Thought Catalog

1. “Chivalry is dead.”

I consider myself a male feminist; I have no issue with the idea women are as capable as men in nearly any tasks. Giving birth is where I may draw the line; you gals are rocking that. However, it is often impossible not to hear some women impart standards upon men when they cry out against even the slightest disregard of inequality which goes their way across the fence. This oft-quoted line could often be pointed towards any person (chivalry applying to both sexes), but it is more often than not a complaint against men who do not pull out chairs, do not carry all the bags, or do not pay for the entirety of a date. So you want a man who treats you with standards imparted by a patriarchal culture? How about a man who wants a woman to quit her job, pump out…

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