*heavy sigh*

I’m just tryina find myself within myself. To find myself  somehow in my self-created madness. I just…I’m just tryina express myself really. And it’s so hard sometimes. 😦



Doing Something Important

“Maybe I’m doing nothing, just running through a film in my mind
Or listening to cars outside on the street
Then there will be a voice in my head
The voice comes and she says
Shouldn’t you be doing something important
Cause look at you sitting through time and time running through you
And away with you
And what have you got to show for your time
But I don’t know…
All I know is I didn’t worry about showing anything for my time
Before I asked myself that question why…”


First Times

Most first times are overhyped. And I’m not just referring to sex. Ok, maybe skydiving or something like that deserves the hype, but most first times tend to be so subtle and have such little impact that you find yourself exaggerating the story when telling it. You know…for dramatic effect and whatnot. So you can feel a bit better about your life.

Wait, wait, wait. Now let me explain. First times really aren’t the be-all and end-all…they’re just an introduction to something new. Unless the moment was highly traumatic or violent or whatever. But that’s another conversation for another day. Yes, they’re important because they’re pivotal and emotional, but that moment should never define you. It should just be a reminder of who you were before. Nothing more. Nothing less. So most first times, in my view, are disappointing because we buy into the idea that they’re  so so great and therefore nothing will ever measure up. (Case in point: Sade’s Never As Good As The First Time) So by the time we experience that first moment we are so invested in our expectations of it that we are unable to live up to that moment.

So I have tried to not overhype/overthink this first word entry. I have no nail-biting, attention-grabbing, controversial subject to write about here. I will in the future. Just not now, so….

With that said, welcome to my blog. 🙂 It honestly can’t get any worse than this entry.

[For more interesting first times however, so you don’t feel like you’ve wasted your time, feel free to check out: http://myfirsttimesa.com]